Post by Ella Scott on Aug 27, 2007 17:06:44 GMT -5
Wow, I haven't been on-line all weekend and just logged in today to find several people have visited my website/forum.
Thanks to all of you for visiting and submitting a post, my dream for this message board is becoming a reality.
I want this to be an on-line support-group for people impacted by narcissism. I have found it very theraputic and healing to talk to and connect with others who have had similar struggles as my own. I hope you find it as helpful as I do.
Just reading what you have posted already reassures me that I am not alone and helps in the healing process. This is exactly what I envisioned for this forum. I hope you look at it in the same way...as a safe place where we can share our stories with one another as well as support and encourage one another.
In my opinion, narcissists do not change. I believe the first step in healing from a relationship with a narcissist is to accept that he/she will never change. Once you do this, you can begin to make changes in your life to make yourself happy.
Narcissists have no empathy. They are like vampires and will suck every last drop of blood out of you, if you let them. To the member who ignored her ex's compliment in the drug store...right on. This is exactly how you need to respond to them...give them no response.
If you are trying to stay away from a narcissist, the best thing you can do is ignore any attempts they make of re-connecting with you. They will do whatever it takes to get a response out of you. They need our response to prove to themselves they are still alive. Otherwise, they feel dead, hollow and empty. By responding, you satisfy them and keep them coming back for more.
Don't respond to him...don't engage...don't acknowledge him at all. For if you do, you are giving him exactly what he wants. If you don't, he'll start to lose interest. Ignore him...he can get his narcissistic supply from someone else. You're done giving to him. It's time to reclaim yourself!
You have all been through so much and I am sorry to hear some of you still have to have contact with your ex. Hopefully, the support of the people on this website will give you the additional strength you need right now. I know the pain can be unbearable at times. Please know we are here for you and we can relate.
I'd like to respond to each and every one of your posts, but want to keep it open for others to respond as well. If you'd like to write directly to me, please feel free to e-mail me any time. Otherwise, I'd like the collective knowledge of the group to really drive this forum.
I am so glad you have decided to join this forum and share your thoughts and knowledge with others who are experiencing something similar. Narcissists never go away easily. Ending your relationship with a narcissist may be a fight to the bitter end. However, when it is done, it will be worth every bit of energy you put into it.
We have the power to make changes in our life, but we cannot endure such struggles alone nor should we. We need to lean on one another and help each other as only we know how. As one member pointed out in her post - people who have never been involved with a narcissist cannot relate or understand what we've been through. You have to experience life with a narcissist to fully appreciate all its horror. It's sad, but very true. We have all been there and can relate.
At the end of the day, we need to accept what we cannot change and change what we can. Sometimes, we must accept the fact that the only person we can change is ourselves. This is when I remember the words of the Serenity Prayer:
God, grant me the Serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
and the Wisdom to know the difference.
Thank you for visiting my website. I hope you find it helpful and encouraging and I look forward to getting to know you.
Thanks to all of you for visiting and submitting a post, my dream for this message board is becoming a reality.
I want this to be an on-line support-group for people impacted by narcissism. I have found it very theraputic and healing to talk to and connect with others who have had similar struggles as my own. I hope you find it as helpful as I do.
Just reading what you have posted already reassures me that I am not alone and helps in the healing process. This is exactly what I envisioned for this forum. I hope you look at it in the same way...as a safe place where we can share our stories with one another as well as support and encourage one another.
In my opinion, narcissists do not change. I believe the first step in healing from a relationship with a narcissist is to accept that he/she will never change. Once you do this, you can begin to make changes in your life to make yourself happy.
Narcissists have no empathy. They are like vampires and will suck every last drop of blood out of you, if you let them. To the member who ignored her ex's compliment in the drug store...right on. This is exactly how you need to respond to them...give them no response.
If you are trying to stay away from a narcissist, the best thing you can do is ignore any attempts they make of re-connecting with you. They will do whatever it takes to get a response out of you. They need our response to prove to themselves they are still alive. Otherwise, they feel dead, hollow and empty. By responding, you satisfy them and keep them coming back for more.
Don't respond to him...don't engage...don't acknowledge him at all. For if you do, you are giving him exactly what he wants. If you don't, he'll start to lose interest. Ignore him...he can get his narcissistic supply from someone else. You're done giving to him. It's time to reclaim yourself!
You have all been through so much and I am sorry to hear some of you still have to have contact with your ex. Hopefully, the support of the people on this website will give you the additional strength you need right now. I know the pain can be unbearable at times. Please know we are here for you and we can relate.
I'd like to respond to each and every one of your posts, but want to keep it open for others to respond as well. If you'd like to write directly to me, please feel free to e-mail me any time. Otherwise, I'd like the collective knowledge of the group to really drive this forum.
I am so glad you have decided to join this forum and share your thoughts and knowledge with others who are experiencing something similar. Narcissists never go away easily. Ending your relationship with a narcissist may be a fight to the bitter end. However, when it is done, it will be worth every bit of energy you put into it.
We have the power to make changes in our life, but we cannot endure such struggles alone nor should we. We need to lean on one another and help each other as only we know how. As one member pointed out in her post - people who have never been involved with a narcissist cannot relate or understand what we've been through. You have to experience life with a narcissist to fully appreciate all its horror. It's sad, but very true. We have all been there and can relate.
At the end of the day, we need to accept what we cannot change and change what we can. Sometimes, we must accept the fact that the only person we can change is ourselves. This is when I remember the words of the Serenity Prayer:
God, grant me the Serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
and the Wisdom to know the difference.
Thank you for visiting my website. I hope you find it helpful and encouraging and I look forward to getting to know you.
